In ancient Tibet, there was a man named Aediba. Whenever he found himself angry or in the midst of an argument, he had a peculiar habit. He would immediately run home and circle his house and land three times before sitting down by the fields to catch his breath. As the years passed, Aediba worked tirelessly, and his house and land expanded significantly. But regardless of how large his property grew, he continued his practice—whenever he got upset, he would run three laps around it.
By the time Aediba had grown old, his property stretched far and wide. One day, after yet another argument, he grabbed his walking stick and, with great effort, completed his customary three laps. When he finally sat down to rest, the sun had already set. Concerned, his grandson approached him and said, “Grandpa, you’re too old to keep doing this. No one around here owns more land than you. You don’t need to run around your property anymore when you’re angry. Can you tell me why you’ve done this your whole life?”
Aediba smiled and replied, “When I was young, every time I got angry, I would run around my house and land. As I ran, I’d think to myself, ‘My house is so small, my land is so little—what right do I have to be angry or argue with anyone?’ That thought always calmed me down, and I would pour all my energy into working harder. Now, even though my house is large and my land vast, I walk around it and think, ‘I have so much—why should I waste my time quarreling with others?’ And once again, my anger fades.”
Just as every rose has its thorns, every person has traits that may frustrate us. The key to happiness is not trying to remove these “thorns,” but learning how to live with them, avoiding getting hurt.
This simple yet profound story teaches us a vital lesson about managing emotions. With family, there’s no need to argue to prove who’s right or wrong. Winning or losing a debate doesn’t matter—home is not a battlefield. We need to make sure our own thorns don’t harm those we love.
When interacting with others, especially those who may not see the world as we do, it’s wise to avoid unnecessary arguments. Not engaging in debates over who’s right shows maturity and emotional intelligence. In fact, most arguments are futile. The real strength lies in holding back, demonstrating grace, and knowing when to step away. Spiritual teachings from ancient times remind us, “When you open your mouth, your energy scatters; when your mind stirs, your internal strength cools.” Engaging in constant disputes not only wastes time but drains our energy.
On Mount Emei, there lived an old monk named Yongtong, who was over 100 years old. Someone once asked him, “Master, what is the secret to happiness?” Yongtong calmly replied, “Never argue.” The person asking wasn’t satisfied with this simple answer and said, “Master, I don’t quite agree with your idea that this is the secret.” Yongtong smiled and said, “Yes, you’re absolutely right…”
Life is full of challenges and difficulties, and none of us can avoid them. However, if we let every problem cause frustration or every small setback lead to anger, life will be full of turmoil. Truly strong individuals know how to control their emotions, step back, and manage problems calmly. Mastering our emotions isn’t about avoiding conflict entirely, but about learning to navigate it with wisdom and grace—leading to a life of peace and fulfillment.
Link:https://peacelilysite.com/2024/10/11/mastering-emotions-the-path-to-inner-peace/
Peace LiLy 